August 25, 2017
Even though this is by far the hardest and most stressful time of our 22.75 years together we've enjoyed some truly amazing experiences in the last six weeks. It feels like a dichotomy to think about how hard it is and yet we feel confident that it's going to be okay...but were not really sure what okay even means.
My brother Shawn said the most profound thing to me tonight:
Confidence comes from living the gospel... present and past. Few regrets from the past, comfortable with the present, and faith in the future.
I never understood how someone could be grateful for trials. I promise you I never felt grateful for 4 years of residency, 8 in-vitro attempt or the 5 miscarriages, the adoptions that didn't happen or my dad dying. That was hard. This is hard. But now I understand. We have seen miracles and we feel buoyed up by all of the prayers in our behalf. And I am truly grateful for this refining experience...
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